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Recent Movie Reviews


: Drugs In Your Head : : Drugs In Your Head :

Rated 0.5 / 5 stars

Um...

I actually DO recall seeing this on newgrounds, are you really just resubmitting your crap that's been taken down? But whatever, it might've been stolen, I'll give you that...
Although I agree with you, being a pretty big hater on drug-users in general myself, your arguments were about as strong as a stoner's argument for weed when they're so high that they can't even form a complete sentence anymore.
And before anyone hates on me for this; I actually do rally for legal marijuana, but not because I want to get high, or I really think it'll be a big medical breakthrough, but to stem crime rates. As for your argument of people coming up with bullshit excuses to get marijuana, its A: a fucking weed. it grows EVERYWHERE. Stoners would just start a little japanese zen garden made out of weed in their backyard, where those who do need it for actual medical purposes can go ahead and get it. and B: what about the epidemic of throwing Ritalin at children because parents or teachers are too lazy to spend time with their kids, or hell, the fact people pop antibiotics for everything and end up building up an immunity to the drug by the time it becomes crucial for them to actually have antibiotics to save their life? You touched on it, but it was obvious your main rant was about pot, and you didn't even rant that well on it.

All and all, I guess I shouldn't hate on you for it, its a rant. Animation wise, It's kinda sad that to go from a new flash to this old one and see that there has been NO ACTUAL IMPROVEMENT. I don't think I'd even care anymore if you at least cleaned up the line-art on Foamy. For fucks sake man, it'll take a total of what, 10 mintues to edit all of your sprites so that the lines aren't jagged? You're a professional now, act like one.



Why (American)Anime Sucks Why (American)Anime Sucks

Rated 1.5 / 5 stars

Welcome to the world of Kid's anime

There are some decent anime out there, you just gotta be able to put up with the way more unrealistic story lines. All the ones I know that are good are either mind-screwers, or so girly its not even funny, i.e. Higurashi no Naku Koro Ni (When Cicadas Cry, horror anime), or Full Moon o Sagashite (Searching for a Full Moon, seriously girly anime). Try out Death Note though, its an amazingly pretty anime, well animated, good actors, and very interesting story line.

Otaku-fit out of the way, too true, I hate the more mainstream anime 'cause its always the same fighting bullshit, and it seems more focused on who has the higher power level/ better deck/pointless jutsu/sword/ship/anything that could be considered a direct comparison to the size of their manhood. I mean, seriously. Do they even try writing?
As for this flash movie itself, needs actual animation dude. I'm not normally a big hater on using Microsoft Sam, but by the way you made it, I seriously couldn't stop thinking that this should've been a clock-lock parody with StrawberryClock vs BananaLock. S'alright though, hope to see more from you. Congrats on the underdog.


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The Ultimate Fight EP: 1 The Ultimate Fight EP: 1

Rated 2 / 5 stars

Uh...

What? but... and.... why...? Well, go for it, but I'm giving you a low score until I see chuck norris, mario, solid snake, mewtwo, or captain america in this. But you get an automatic 10 if you can put in psycho mantis with "psycho-kineeeeesis."

That aside, expand the background if you're going to simulate shake-y cam like that so we don't see the cerulean oblivion. Also, don't make a "power-up" animation for someone unless you have all the sprites for the power-up. I'd also strongly suggest studying other all-out-brawl type movies for choreography of the fights itself. It didn't really feel like a real fight, so much as a pillow fight where no one really wants to break a nail. Show some carnage, show some aggression.


Recent Game Reviews


(Twisted) Cooking Mama (Twisted) Cooking Mama

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

This site is getting to damn political

Before I begin, I voted purely on the skill I perceived with which this game was made. There's a lot of bugs in this, I'm not going to lie. The directions are vague, and the pot-shots at cooking mama weren't funny, all that original, and somewhat insulting. I didn't laugh, I didn't even smirk, I ended up rolling my eyes through most of this, and I can laugh with super-vegetarians that claim meat is murder.

Now, on the political side of this... I hate vegetarians. Why? Because I believe you're showing even less respect to these poor animals by not eating them. I do NOT in any way endorse cruelty to animals, and if I lived outside the city, I would grow my own chickens to make sure they lived a great life, and are slaughtered in the most humane way possible, because then they'd be like my family. Even though I hate chickens. Peck-y, angry little bastards.
I've seen what they do in the factories to these poor animals, and I despise them for it. I have also played a role in preventing pet-cruelty both when I see it in action, and have volunteered at pet shelters to find abandoned and abused animals a home in the aftermath. Every animal is as alive as you and I, and has the same rights to live as happily and as comfortably as you and I. I agree with you, something needs to be done to these factories to get them to stop what they're doing, its just wrong to take away these basic rights.
And for those that say "Fuck it, they're just animals, who cares?" Alright, you can take it that way too. If it were between an animal's life, and a human's life, most people who reach out to save the human, and I have no qualms with that. I'd do the same unless it was someone like Osama or Hitler.
But here's the thing: putting these animals in these abusive, inhumane situations are not just morally wrong: it puts the consumer at a higher risk of disease, exposes them to all sorts of weird ass conditions because of the drugs used on the animals, or the infections the animals receive when their mal-nourished, fragile bones snap. Avian bird flu and mad cow disease are great examples of this animal cruelty affecting human lives.
And, if you don't believe this is true, and just propaganda... I assure you; free range tastes better. They're stronger, healthier creatures, and if they eat better-- so do you when you eat them. My grandma lives on a farm, and their family used to eat their own livestock. Although, when their favorite cow, whom had become as close as a family dog to them, was taken to the butcher by my great grandfather, the poor cow was understandably left in the freezer for the father to finish off himself.

Anyway, back to the point... Meat is murder, yes. But piling the bodies into a landfill is not only pollution, but senseless murder.
Thank you for educating the public a little more on the atrocities of the meat factories, but FFS, PLEASE take action as well. Send a letter to your state rep, protest outside the factory, get people to sign a petition to propose a law against this cruelty, SOMETHING. Don't just sit there crying about it, the corporations don't care.


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Pandemic II Pandemic II

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

Big disappointment really...

I was so pumped when I had seen that you made a sequel, and dived into playing at once. Now, given; I'm not the best player at Pandemic, because I normally lose my patience and just start trying to kill everyone I've infected... but its kinda sad that you made everyone in the world apparently not only a psychic, but a damn genius to boot when it comes to your disease. I thought at first there were underlying symptoms or something that I hadn't turned off yet... but no, these people just magically know that somewhere down the line, this virus that's spreading like wildfire will bring about the apocalypse. I would've been able to deal with that, I really would've... I successfully infected the entire world once--- that is... all but one country.

Madagascar. What the hell is up with this place? They apparently have airports, 'cause I get the message that they've shut it down... but I've never seen an airport on it, and lo and behold, airplanes avoid this place like... well, the bloody plague. Boats as well, even though there's a damn port there. I really haven't the faintest clue how to infect Madagascar other than crazy magician powers, because I was kinda hoping my killer bees heralding the world's damnation would be able to make that little hop between southern Africa and there, but no.

And I've actually gotten so frustrated I watched once, to see if a boat only lands there once. Nope. Watched throughout my entire game, and the boat didn't land once in Madagascar. One boat did leave once though. I nearly cried in glee that at least this place does somewhat interact with the rest of the world, but holy hell.

If it wasn't for Madagascar, the psychic doctors (which I'm really hoping is a glitch), and the lack of rioters that would've made gameplay a little more fun, this game would've been a dream come true. =(


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Pico & Pals Pico & Pals

Rated 3 / 5 stars

Could've been way better

Repetitive. And very annoying. What the hell is with the "ALERT CAMPER" warning anyway? I understand if you just stand in one place this game and let all the characters run to you to smack 'em to death... but what the hell am I supposed to do when they've knocked me into a corner? Leap into the middle and let them beat me to death? Other big annoyance: the ending glitch. Awesome, I played through the entire game just to tell me I failed somehow. Thought it had something to do with the camper alert, or maybe I didn't find all the raccoons... nope, still happening.

Other than those big annoyances though... good, I guess. Not amazing, and it feels thrown together. Very short, and other qualms to mention...

-Please don't make the punch and kick/pick up buttons F, and G when the move buttons are WASD. Try putting them where the right hand's "home keys" are next time.
-The pick up option was useless. Throwing trash cans is just annoying, and the kicks in the nuts were somewhat amusing, but very pointless.

However, I did like the art and animation style, so I give you a 6 for trying.


Recent Audio Reviews


Star Wars - Duel of Fates Star Wars - Duel of Fates

Rated 3 / 5 stars

Meh.

Well performed under the restraints of not having the whole team that the original composer had. It just doesn't have the same kind of kick as the original track though, actually rather lifeless. Like its the theme for the disinterested person walking by a tv playing star wars. It's supposed to sound so much more... soul trembling, if that makes any sense. it could've done with being a little louder, and played with a little more passion put into it around 3:19 it kicks slightly... but to be honest, the removal of the choir seriously watered it down. When you make a cover, it should either be changed, or sound alot like the original. In reference to the original, its like Diet coke. Almost there, but it still tastes empty.
But for the effort, and how skillfully it was played, I give you a 6. Kudos, but it just lacks the passion to me, man.


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lost in mood lost in mood

Rated 4 / 5 stars

well done

nicely executed, makes me think of someone being drawn away to a pleasant fantasy while thumbing through a book, or a tired father returning, and peeks in to see his wife and daughter playing happily, hopefully awaiting his return. Definitely gives you a feeling of serenity. Could've done without the static though; unless that's what you're going for? Like an elderly man listening to an old record, reminiscing on old times? I'm just taking up space now, lol, but good job none the less.


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Journey To The Snow Journey To The Snow

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

Sounds like Mac Lopez and Lee Johnson's work

For that reason alone I'm giving you a lower score. When I first happened upon it, I could've sworn I had heard it before, but without hard evidence, I can't really accuse you of anything. If this is your work, amazing job, its addicting to listen to, and sounds very authentic. Sorry if I'm wrong about the stolen music, its just it sounds like their work